It Hurts More Than I Expected

I am so sick of being hurt over and over again for no reason. I want more than anything to be able to say "Leave me alone, I'm tired of feeling shattered." but I can't. I stay here and take everything that gets thrown at me, not saying a word and then I tell myself that things will get better. If I can just pretend for one more day, things will get better again. I love him too much to let go, even if it's for my own good.

I feel so broken right now. I don't want to bring people down by complaining about my problems. This is all I have. Writing. I don't want to be one of those kids that you can't stand to be around because all they do is bring you down with their problems. For once, I just want someone to listen and tell me that everything is going to be okay. Someone to hold me in their arms and just let me cry. Someone to soothe me to sleep as I cry my heart out. Someone who is unbiased. Simply: someone who will always love me. And no, don't tell me God does. I don't believe in God anymore.

I don't know what to do. I need direction now more than ever. I'm so scared.
















Thank you "magnetomotive" for putting my thoughts in a picture.