Strange

Today was, as Grant deemed it, "Frunday." That is, a mix between Monday and Friday, because that's really what it was for us. And it only happens once in a life time...

Well, this was me last night:

I decided that today was good. Even though I sat around all day, I had undisturbed time to think. I thought about life, the future, love, and my happiness. Overall, I am pleased with current happenings.

Once again the ocean of the world has taken a hold of me and pulled me along with the current. This time, however, I have learned how to swim. I will fight my hardest to keep my head above the water and if I slip under again, I will have learned my lesson. I will know that there is something worth fighting for. I won't give up. And most of all, I won't give in to anything or anyone. This all seems so much easier now that Nate is out of my life for good... ahh, what a relief...

I don't want to stop smiling. I don't want to lose this good feeling I've been carrying around lately. I want to rub off on people. In a good way.

Basically, I'm happy, and no one is going to change that.

But today:

I dunno, I'm frustrated. I was really apathetic all day today. I miss our art teacher, Mr. Bratrud, and I don't think he's coming back... I'm so confused with all the boys in my life and have no idea which path to take. My mom is bugging me to get a job and then FINALLY today, my best friend decides to tell me that the last time I applied to Jack In The Box (where she works) I didn't score high enough because apparently you have to answer those personality questions to make yourself look good, even if they're not true. Guh. And she never thought to tell me. Thanks, Kristin.

I came home feeling anxious, and I didn't now why. I was going to sleep, but was too out of it even to sleep. Next, I decided on painting, but I knew I'd just get frustrated and make a mess. Then it was picture time. I'm continuing my little experiment with fruit and water shots until I get one that I am satisfied with.

I guess for the rest of the night I'm just going to sit around, talk to people, and read. I might have to beat Justin up the next time I see him, lol. Oh well. All is well, I guess.





















Orange, yeah? I'm still not happy with them...